For over a year I have said that decision to marry is not quantifiable. There is no way on earth to know if you are truly in love or if the marriage will workout. I don’t have that much belief neither in the astrological predictions of future nor in the statistical projections of psychological traits. What if I end up with someone totally incompatible? What can I find about a person just by talking for a few days after an arranged marriage interview date? These drove me to the decision less road that glorifies enjoying life as single.

She wasn’t a pretty doll. Definitely not the kind of face that would tangle your vision in the middle of the road, making your eyes follow her trail and your mind pleading her to stop and turn around once again. But there, in front of one of the most beautiful beaches, amidst all the beach walkers, she looked serene and striking. A clear blemishless face, large expressive eyes, thin wide lips with a natural mild pout let my brain capture every pixel of the priceless face and persist it to eternity.

Sitting besides her, gazing at the sky searching for moving stars ;-) “Hey…look isn’t that star shining too bright; may be it is Mercury” I completed with a grin. “No way, can’t you see that moving fast” the reply came in a flash and I was smiling like an idiot. Never a quiet moment; either of us had something to talk. A few lip twisting smiles, a few wide mouthed laughs and the clock was ticking in an unprecedented speed. Many evenings, I’ve stood in the same place waiting for the sun god to hide under the endless mighty waters of the Pacific, but that day I wanted him to stay still just kissing the cold blue waters.

Well, he didn’t listen and it was already time for dinner. “Where do we go for dinner?” I asked my usual question with an expectation that it would bounce back immediately. Cognizant of her taste for Thai cuisine, my poor camry was heading to Thai Grill. Damn the clock; it was past 10.00 and the restaurant was closed. Definitely not a good sign for a Friday night dinner together, but managed it with a stupid self deprecating signature smile. Now was my turn to ask her pick the place. This time in my favor, her pick was closed too :-) . We stepped into another Thai place next door, where few hungry mongrels were still hogging their food.

We stepped in and I said “Table for two”. We were seated instantaneously in the almost empty restaurant. Her elegant eyes were ever busy for while, capturing every element of the restaurant besides me, but mine had only one element to look at (wasn’t the menu card this time ;-) ). She was skimming through the menu peacefully and I asked her to order my food too. She nodded and we ordered. Our eyes witnessing the fight between shining metal forks and glossy porcelain plates, mouth enjoying the outcome of every cling, we passed a few minutes. Ever hibernating appetite of hers gave up pretty soon. Mine didn’t last for a long time either. Neither of our plates was even close to half empty.

Until the last move of my fork towards my mouth, I was completely cool. The last piece of chicken found its way through my food pipe and my heart started pounding. I felt like there was a big lump in my throat, preventing words to come out. I was contemplating if I should open my mouth or not. Hey…there was nothing wrong with the chicken; it was all me. The check arrived by then and I took care of that in a minute. It was now time to head back home. The screen of my dream evening was about to fall without a climax. I asked myself “Should I hold the screen for a while and enact the climax?” Couldn’t answer myself, but something in me took over.

Cleared my throat in a second and I started pouring out what I had kept deep inside me for a week. I could see that she was amused. She wasn’t smiling or tilting her head to one side and giving me a look like I was nuts. But I knew she was, by the way she was toying with her fork and driving the lifeless morsel of rice to the edges of the curry blemished porcelain. I paused in between and she was still staring at her plate, her brows were almost merging in concentration and I continued. Before I could realize, I had poured out all I had wanted. Good things, bad things…everything. Never before in life had I thought I could ever do that, but yes I did. Don’t know if I did that to perfection, but with that heavy pounding heart that was the best I could.

Walk back to the car was strangely quiet. We’ve always had something to talk about, but now, walk in the downtown street felt like a walk in a deserted beach after a typhoon. It was too weird for me. In the next few minutes, we were heading home and I pulled all my energy together to ask “So, what do you think?”. “Should I say it now?” was the answer in a clear unshaken voice. Before my mathematically weak brain could work out all the permutations and combinations, my passenger door opened in front of her apartment and there fell the curtain to my question mark climax dream evening.